The Absolute Worst Case Of Shrinkage (A Tale of Gilberts Downfall)

from International Criminals Of Surf by The Big Face And The Boogie Woogie Boogie Board Boys

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lyrics

Well,
It's Winter time and I need my surfin' fix,
I go to the beach
It's colder then I remember,
It's coldest then I could of ever remembered

Oh, winter dick 'n' balls
So tiny, so tiny small,
I got winter, winter dick and balls

So my dick shrunk up inside me,
I look to my left,
and see this babe beside me
but when I get back to her place,
she's less then impressed

I got winter dick 'n' balls
So tiny, so tiny small,
I got winter,
winter dick and balls

So I get these breast implants,
I don't know why but anyway
I'm out on a date with this guy
"It's going great"
we get back to his place
A surprise on his face
"Oh ah s-sorry, I-I'm not gay"
I'm like "Oh get out of the way!"
But its too late his face is where I spray
He just screams likes he's going insane
"It's been a while" I try and explain,
"This has been the worst date"
Thats when I look directly into the camera
and say "You think that's bad?"
"...I've made a huge mistake"

I wish I still had
Winter dick 'n' balls
So tiny, so tiny small
I got winter,
Winter dick and -
Winter dick 'n' balls
So tiny, so tiny small
I got winter,
Winter dick and-
Winter dick and-
Winter dick and balls
Balls

credits

from International Criminals Of Surf, released December 17, 2014

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The Big Face And The Boogie Woogie Boogie Board Boys Melbourne, Australia

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